genius is as genius does.

This post has been floating around in my head for a long time.I have learnt to appreciate geniuses, and they are very much acquired taste.

I have never thought of myself as genius, and I don’t think I will ever be. Have been watching a lot of “My Brilliant Brain” before I left for India though.Found out that one common thread among geniuses: they tend to be weird people, socially handicapped (in a small ways or larger ones), and not very good in dealing with relationships.

Of course,that’s not true of all geniuses, there are some that are blessed in both IQ and EQ. Though geniuses know a lot, they seem to spend more time with things, rather than people. They seem to love to know more about things, theories, and perhaps perceive the world in a theoretical way where everything can be owned with the mind.

I have never mixed much with these people, been traditionally attracted to socially effervescent characters.But that day when I was leaving for India,I was taking stock of all my relationships, I suddenly felt very guilty, like I havent been enough of a friend to Cassandra.Like Ive missed her out even though she was written into my life. I havent listened or known, though I had so many opportunities to, I haven’t loved, realised or understood, or let this person add to my perspective.

So I called Cassandra and we had a three part conversation, each lasting an hour. I think she is one of the smartest persons I’ve ever met, and definitely one to change my life, to realise how small I am.

Cassandra’s drawings have always been passionate, obsessive, intense ,perhaps evolving from a chock-a-bloc of emotions and a recognition of the fallenness in human nature.I’ve always admired artists and the time they spend to express their imagination, believing in their own worlds and not others. During our conversation, Cassandra told me of storylines for graphic novels, did an extensive commentary on transformers, we talked about Shakespeare, Titus Andronicus, King Lear,Hamlet, Taming of the Shrew, Othello, she seemed to be able to quote something from everything.(and I cant confirm what she was quoting was true or not) We talked about Helena Bonham Carter, Tim Burton and many other things I did not know about, many other things which I thought would not matter to my life in a practical sense.

But I am truly in awe of the depth and breadth of a genius’ mind.Of course, Cassandra does not speak in a very “attractive” manner so to speak, there is a “marked verbosity” in her speech, perhaps a lack of what I call “the sense of others”.There are many times in our conversation where I got lost, simply cos she was going too fast, or my mind was too retarded to follow up.

So to free myself of all distractions, I closed my eyes and listened to her on the phone.I think these were some of the best moments of my life, when I was transported to a “universe” that was not my own and truly free to imagine or feel someone else’s world. Some of us, our “worlds”, perspectives are very much rooted in reality and day to day interactions, while others are totally inventive.They have worlds of their own, like Middle Earth, like Harry Porter, like Sandman and all the Neil Gaiman stuff, and this is not the common world that other people can easily understand.Nonetheless, it is beautiful.

I respect Cassandra and people like that. Because my imagination is dull next to theirs. When I closed my eyes to listen, I felt small, very small in Cassandra’s world, almost as someone who would not matter, because I didn’t have all that mattered: which is IMAGINATION. Reality has dulled it, I am boxed because I have obligations to maintain, ties to uphold, people to love: all these being weights to hold me down, in good ways or bad.

One thing though: geniuses are passionate, that’s what they are. They pursue what they want doggedly, without being afraid of opportunity costs: they do whatever it takes because they have a vision of what they want it to be.

I don’t know. I am still contemplating my way in that. I think it is beautiful that people can be so passionate about somethings. As we grow up and meet with failures, it is easy to be ambivalent, to withdraw from injecting so much faith or expectation into things, for fear of failing.But passion carries a long way and eliminates those factors.It is something I desire, something I truly want for myself.

But yet again, putting all your eggs in one basket: there must be some space for disappointment.In the intense pursuit for their worlds, there must be a lot of OTHER things they must be missing out on.

People like Cassandra,people so different from me have changed my life and broadened my perspective.But there is one thing I believe in: there is a common denominator in man, we want the same things when the day is done.That is the essence I am looking for in all my interactions with people: the one same humanness that exists in each of us within the shell of different-ness.

And so genius is as genius does.I am in love with the breadth and the depth of their minds: I think it is a wonderous place awaiting to be explored.